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'Light fuse and get away' may work for a Roman candle, but not so much for the wrath of a woman scorned.
Author: J. Jacques

I, thus neglecting worldly ends, all dedicated To closeness and the bettering of my mind.
Author: William Shakespeare

Living apart and at peace with myself, I came to realize more vividly the meaning of the doctrine of acceptance. To refrain from giving advice, to refrain from meddling in the affairs of others, to refrain, even though the motives be the highest, from tam
Author: Henry Miller

Living is a form of not being sure, not knowing what next or howWe guess. We may be wrong, but we take leap after leap in the dark.
Author: Agnes de Mille

Look not mournfully into the past. It comes not back again. Wisely improve the present. It is thine. Go forth to meet the shadowy future, without fear.
Author: Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Charley wanted to buy Farley a birthday cake, but he couldn't figure out how to get the cake in the typewriter so he could type 'Happy Birthday'
This is the joke from a category: Birthday jokes

The blind farmer was often taken for a walk in the fields by a kind neighbor. However kindly the neighbor might have been, he was undoubtedly a coward. When a bull charged towards them one day, he abandoned the blind man. The bull, puzzled by a lack of fear, nudged the farmer in the back. He turned very quickly, caught the bull by the horns and threw it to the ground with a bump that left it breathless. "Aidan," said the neighbor, "I never knew you were so strong." "Faith, and if I could have got that fella off the handlebars of the bicycle I'd have thrashed him properly."
This is the joke from a category: Blind jokes

Q: What did a blind boy's parent's do to punish him? A: Rearranged the furniture
This is the joke from a category: Blind jokes

Why are bats blind? Well, your eyesight wouldn't be too good if you hung upside down all day would it?
This is the joke from a category: Blind jokes

A blind man walks into a store with his seeing eye dog. All of a sudden, he picks up the leash and begins swinging the dog over his head. The manager runs up to the man and asks, "What are you doing?!!" The blind man replies, "Just looking around."
This is the joke from a category: Blind jokes