Best Cell Phones

I like weights. You know where you stand with them. Well, sometimes you're lying under them, trying not to let them crush you, but you see, you KNOW they'd crush you if they could. There's honesty.
Author: T. Campbell and Gisele Lagace

Under a government which imprisons any unjustly, the true place for a just man is in prison.
Author: Henry David Thoreau

Under democracy one party always devotes its chief energies to trying to prove that the other party is unfit to rule - and both commonly succeed, and are right.
Author: H. L. Mencken

It is true that I was born in Iowa, but I can't speak for my twin sister.
Author: Abigail Van Buren

Just because your voice reaches halfway around the world doesn't mean you are wiser than when it reached only to the end of the bar.
Author: Edward R. Murrow

Why are vampires like false teeth? They all come out at night.
This is the joke from a category: Teeth jokes

Why did the alien phone home on his mobile? Because it was so ET !
This is the joke from a category: Telephone jokes

The phone in Rigby's Georgia farmhouse rang one evening. When he answered, the operator said, "This is long distance from Chicago." "I knowed it's a long distance from Chicago!" answered the farmer. "How come you called to tell me that?"
This is the joke from a category: Telephone jokes

How does a skeleton call her friends? On a telebone.
This is the joke from a category: Telephone jokes

What game do you play if you don't take care of your teeth? Tooth (truth) or Consequences.
This is the joke from a category: Teeth jokes