Best Cell Phones

If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions?
Author: Scott Adams

In this life we get only those things for which we hunt, for which we strive, and for which we are willing to sacrifice.
Author: George Matthew Adams

In times like these, it helps to recall that there have always been times like these.
Author: Paul Harvey

In your clothes avoid too much gaudiness; do not value yourself upon an embroidered gown; and remember that a reasonable word, or an obliging look, will gain you more respect than all your fine trappings.
Author: Sir George Savile

Indeed the dictum that truth always triumphs over persecution, is one of those pleasant falsehoods which men repeat after one another till they pass into common places, but which all experience refutes.
Author: John Stuart Mill

What do you call an and with frogs legs ? An antphibian !
This is the joke from a category: Ant jokes

What lives in apples and is an avid reader? A bookworm !
This is the joke from a category: Apple jokes

A few days after Christmas, a mother was working in the kitchen listening to her son playing with his new airplane in the living room. She heard her son said, "All of you sons of bitches get the hell off the plane now, cause this is the last stop! And all of you sons of bitches who are getting on, get your asses in the plane, cause we're going to take-off now." The mother went in and told her son, "We don't use that kind of language in this house. Now I want you to go to your room and you are to stay there for TWO HOURS. When you come out, you may play with your plane, but I want you to use nice language." Two hours later, the son comes out of the bedroom and resumes playing with his plane. Soon the mother heard her son say, "All passengers who are deplaning, please remember to take all of your belongings with you. We thank you for flying with us today and hope your tr ip was a pleasant one. We hope you will fly with us again soon." She hears the little boy continue, "For those of you just boarding, we ask you to stow all of your hand luggage under your seat. Remember, there is no smoking on the plane. We hope you will have a pleasant and relaxing journey with us today." As the mother began to smile, the child added, "For those of you who are pissed off about the TWO HOUR delay, please see the bitch in the kitchen."
This is the joke from a category: Aviation jokes

Tom: What did the banana say to the elephant? Nick: I don't know. Tom: Nothing. Bananas can't talk.
This is the joke from a category: Banana jokes

Knock knock. Who's there? Baby Owl. Baby Owl who? Baby Owl see you later, baby not.
This is the joke from a category: Baby jokes