People can have the Model T in any colour--so long as it's black.
Author: Henry Ford

If you want to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe.
Author: Carl Sagan

People find life entirely too time-consuming.
Author: Stanislaw J. Lec

People in general are scared to death of the war and all the exhibition have been a failure, because the rich - don't want to buy anything.
Author: Frida Kahlo

Like so many Americans, she was trying to construct a life that made sense from things she found in gift shops.
Author: Kurt Vonnegut

Why was the mother flea so unhappy? All her children had gone to the dogs.
This is the joke from a category: Dog jokes

Four workers were discussing how smart their dogs were. The first was an engineer who said his dog could draw. His dog's name was "T-Square", and he told him to get some paper and draw a square, a circle and a triangle, which he did with no sweat. The accountant said he thought his dog, "Balance", could do better. He told him to fetch a dozen cookies and divide them into piles of three, which he did with no problem. The chemist said that was a very good stunt, but that his dog, "Apothecary", could do better yet. He told his dog to get a quart of milk and pour seven ounces into a ten ounce glass. Apothecary did this without a hitch. All three men agreed their dogs were equally smart. They turned to the Civil Servant and asked him what his dog could do. The Civil Servant called his dog, whose name was "Coffee break", and said, "Show the fellows what you can do, old buddy." Coffee Break then stroll ed over and ate the cookies, drank the milk, shit on the paper, screwed the other three dogs and claimed he injured his back while doing so. He then filed a grievance for unsafe conditions, applied for Workers' Compensation, and left for home on sick leave.
This is the joke from a category: Dog jokes

What do you call a boring dog? A dull-mation!
This is the joke from a category: Dog jokes

What kind of computers do chihuahuas like best? Lap-top!
This is the joke from a category: Dog jokes

A Chihuahua was shopping in a mall when another shopper walked up to it and started talking. Didn't I see you on a TV commercial? How am I supposed to know what you watch on TV?
This is the joke from a category: Dog jokes