Man is the only animal that laughs and has a state legislature.
Author: Samuel Butler

If a man takes no thought about what is distant, he will find sorrow near at hand.
Author: Confucius

People are usually more convinced by reasons they discovered themselves than by those found by others.
Author: Blaise Pascal

People drain me, even the closest of friends, and I find loneliness to be the best state in the union to live in.
Author: Margaret Cho

People might not get all they work for in this world, but they must certainly work for all they get.
Author: Frederick Douglass

Which dog can tell time? A watchdog.
This is the joke from a category: Dog jokes

Why did the dog go to the doctor after a tomato fell on his head? The tomato was in a can.
This is the joke from a category: Dog jokes

Why did the dog's owner think his dog was a great mathematician? When he asked the dog what six minus six was, the dog said nothing.
This is the joke from a category: Dog jokes

Why doesn't a dog ever have a nose 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot.
This is the joke from a category: Dog jokes

Why is a dog with a lame leg like adding 6 and 7s? He puts down the three and carries the one.
This is the joke from a category: Dog jokes