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I have seen gross intolerance shown in support of tolerance.
Author: Samuel Taylor Coleridge

I have the consolation of having added nothing to my private fortune during my public service, and of retiring with hands clean as they are empty.
Author: Thomas Jefferson

I hope that while so many people are out smelling the flowers, someone is taking the time to plant some.
Author: Herbert Rappaport

I improve on misquotation.
Author: Cary Grant

I keep six honest serving-men (They taught me all I knew); Their names are What and Why and When And How and Where and Who.
Author: Rudyard Kipling

Q: What do you call counterfeited German currency? A: Question marks.
This is the joke from a category: Money jokes

How did Dr Frankenstein pay the men who built his monster? On a piece rate.
This is the joke from a category: Monster jokes

Dr Frankenstein: Igor, have you seen my latest invention? It's a new pill consisting of 50 per cent glue and 50 per cent aspirin. Igor: But what's it for? Dr Frankenstein: For monsters with splitting headaches.
This is the joke from a category: Monster jokes

Why did the monster stop playing with his brother? He got tired of kicking him around.
This is the joke from a category: Monster jokes

What does a monster do when he loses his head? He calls a head hunter.
This is the joke from a category: Monster jokes