Best Cell Phones

I believe that people would be alive today if there were a death penalty.
Author: Nancy Reagan

I bought a cactus. A week later it died. And I got depressed, because I thought, Damn. I am less nurturing than a desert.
Author: Demetri Martin

I came to the realization that there were certain public issues that were most usefully dealt with within some sort of framework of at least my private beliefs, if not my private life.
Author: Anna Quindlen

I can forgive Alfred Nobel for having invented dynamite, but only a fiend in human form could have invented the Nobel Prize.
Author: George Bernard Shaw

I can think of nothing more boring for the American people than to have to sit in their living rooms for a whole half hour looking at my face on their television screens.
Author: Dwight D. Eisenhower

How did skeletons send each other letters in the days of the Wild West? By Bony Express.
This is the joke from a category: Letter jokes

An Irishman went into a post office to see if there were any letters for him. "I'll see, sir," said the clerk. "What is your name?" "You're having me on now because I'm Irish," said the Irishman. "Won't you see the name on the envelope?"
This is the joke from a category: Letter jokes

Josh sent a letter to his folks. He told about a ten-mile hike he had taken. His father wrote back saying, 'In my day I thought nothing of walking ten miles.' Josh wrote back, 'To tell the truth, I didn't think much of it either.
This is the joke from a category: Letter jokes

When is a letter damp? When it has postage due (dew).
This is the joke from a category: Letter jokes

Which two letters of the alphabet are nothing? MT (empty) .
This is the joke from a category: Letter jokes