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He felt that his whole life was some kind of dream and he sometimes wondered whose it was and whether they were enjoying it.
Author: Douglas Adams

He had learned over the years that poor people did not feel so poor when allowed to give occasionally.
Author: Lawana Blackwell

He hasn't an enemy in the world - but all his friends hate him.
Author: Eddie Cantor

He is indebted to his memory for his jests and to his imagination for his facts.
Author: Richard Brinsley Sheridan

He is rich enough that wants nothing.
Author: Polish Proverb

What do you call a tube with a degree? A graduated cylinder.
This is the joke from a category: Humor jokes

Q: Why did the Mummy go to the bathroom? A: To wrap itself in toilet paper!
This is the joke from a category: Humor jokes

Some men go on a hunting trip and separate into pairs. That evening one hunter, Sam, returned to camp alone toting a 12 point buck. "Where's George?" one of the men asked, noticing that Sam had returned alone. "He's about 6 miles back. He tripped and broke his ankle. I left him there 'cause I figured ain't nobody 'bout to steal him."
This is the joke from a category: Hunting jokes

Commissioned by a zoo to bring them some baboons, the big game hunter devised a novel scheme to trap them - his only requirements being a sack, a gun, and a particularly vicious and bad tempered dog. Once in the jungle he explained to his assistant, "I'll climb this tree and shake the branches; if there are any baboons up there, they will fall to the ground - and the dogs will bite their tail and immobilise them so that you can pick them up quite safely and put them in the sack." "But what do I need the gun for?" asked the assisant. "If I should fall out of the tree by mistake, shoot the dog."
This is the joke from a category: Hunting jokes

An avid duck hunter was in the market for a new bird dog. His search ended when he found a dog that could actually walk on water to retrieve a duck. Shocked by his find, he was sure none of his friends would ever believe him. He decided to try to break the news to a friend of his, the eternal pessimist who refused to be impressed with anything. This, surely, would impress him. He invited him to hunt with him and his new dog. As they waited by the shore, a flock of ducks flew by. they fired, and a duck fell. The dog responded and jumped into the water. The dog, however, did not sink but instead walked across the water to retrieve the bird, never getting more than his paws wet. This continued all day long; each time a duck fell, the dog walked across the surface of the water to retrieve it. The pessimist watched carefully, saw everything, but did not say a single word. On the drive home the hunter asked his friend, "Did you notice anything unusual about my new dog?" "I sure did," responded the pessimist. "He can't swim."
This is the joke from a category: Hunting jokes