There will always be a part, and always a very large part of every community, that have no care but for themselves, and whose care for themselves reaches little further than impatience of immediate pain, and eagerness for the nearest good.
Author: Samuel Johnson

Humor is our way of defending ourselves from life's absurdities by thinking absurdly about them.
Author: Lewis Mumford

I have often regretted my speech, never my silence.
Author: Publilius Syrus

There's a whiff of the lynch mob or the lemming migration about any overlarge concentration of like-thinking individuals, no matter how virtuous their cause.
Author: P. J. O Rourke

There's an empty spot I've always had inside me. I tried to fill it with family, religion, community service, but those were dead ends! I think this chair is the answer.
Author: Matt Groening

Teacher: Can anyone give me the name of a liquid that won't freeze ? Pupil: Hot water !
This is the joke from a category: School jokes

Teacher: Fred can you find me Australia on the map please ? Pupil: There it is Teacher: Now, Louise, who discovered Australia ? Pupil: Fred did !
This is the joke from a category: School jokes

Teacher: In music, if "f" means "forte", what does "ff" mean ? Pupil: Eighty
This is the joke from a category: School jokes

Pupil: The art teacher doesn't like what I'm making ? Dad: Why is that, what are you making ? Pupil: Mistakes !
This is the joke from a category: School jokes

Teacher: What is the formula for water ? George: H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O Teacher: Is that the formula I gave you ? George: Sure, you said H to O !
This is the joke from a category: School jokes