I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.
Author: Will Rogers

There is only one religion, though there are a hundred versions of it.
Author: George Bernard Shaw

There is still a difference between something and nothing, but it is purely geometrical and there is nothing behind the geometry.
Author: Martin Gardner

So act that your principle of action might safely be made a law for the whole world.
Author: Immanuel Kant

I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks.
Author: Steve Martin

What's the longest piece of furniture in the school? The multiplication table.
This is the joke from a category: School jokes

'Ann!' the teacher shouted one day at the girl who had been daydreaming out the window. 'If India has the world's second largest population, oranges are 50 cents for six and it costs $3 for a day return to Austin, how old am I ? 'Thirty two!' 'Why did you say that ?' 'Well, my brother's sixteen and he's half mad !'
This is the joke from a category: School jokes

Teacher: Why didn't you answer me ? Pupil: I did, I shook my head Teacher: You don't expect me to hear it rattling from here do you !
This is the joke from a category: School jokes

Laugh and the class laughs with you. But you get detention alone !
This is the joke from a category: School jokes

Teacher: What's 2 and 2 Pupil: 4 Teacher: That's good Pupil: Good ?, that's perfect !
This is the joke from a category: School jokes