I went off to college planning to major in math or philosophy-- of course, both those ideas are really the same idea.
Author: Frank Wilczek

Set thine house in order.
Author: Bible

Lighter is the wound foreseen.
Author: Cato the Elder

Sharing food with another human being is an intimate act that should not be indulged in lightly.
Author: M. F. K. Fisher

She had learned the self-deprecating ways of the woman who does not want to be thought hard and grasping, but her artifices could not always cover the nakedness of her need to excel.
Author: Faith Sullivan

What sort of soup do skeletons like? One with plenty of body in it.
This is the joke from a category: Food jokes

What is small, furry and smells like bacon? A hamster.
This is the joke from a category: Food jokes

Why did your brother give up his job in the biscuit factory? Because he went crackers.
This is the joke from a category: Food jokes

Why can't you make bread like my mother? I would if you could make dough like your father!
This is the joke from a category: Food jokes

How do you know that a elephant's been in the fridge? There are foot prints in the butter. "
This is the joke from a category: Food jokes