Science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind.
Author: Albert Einstein

I will make a Star-chamber matter of it.
Author: William Shakespeare

I don't have a girlfriend. But I do know a woman who'd be mad at me for saying that.
Author: Mitch Hedberg

Self-esteem is the reputation we acquire with ourselves.
Author: Nathaniel Branden

Never knock on Death's door: ring the bell and run away! Death really hates that!
Author: Matt Frewer

How do you get around fast on the bottom of the sea? Skates!
This is the joke from a category: Fishing jokes

What do dirty fish read? Prawno Magazines!
This is the joke from a category: Fishing jokes

A new chef from India was fired a week after starting the job. He keep favoring curry.
This is the joke from a category: Food jokes

Sign in restaurant window: "Eat now - Pay waiter."
This is the joke from a category: Food jokes

An elderly couple were killed in an accident and found themselves being given a tour of heaven by Saint Peter. "Here is your oceanside condo, over there are the tennis courts, swimming pool, and two golf courses. If you need any refreshments, just stop by any of the many bars located throughout the area." "Heck, Gloria," the old man hissed when Saint Peter walked off, "we could have been here ten years ago if you hadn't heard about all that stupid oat bran, wheat germ, and low-fat diets!"
This is the joke from a category: Food jokes