I am just going outside and may be some time.
Author: Captain Lawrence Oates

Riches do not delight us so much with their possession, as torment us with their loss.
Author: Dick Gregory

Ritual is the way you carry the presence of the sacred. Ritual is the spark that must not go out.
Author: Christina Baldwin

Romance is dead. It was acquired in a hostile takeover by Hallmark and Disney, homogenized, and sold off piece by piece.
Author: Matt Groening

Scandal is gossip made tedious by morality.
Author: Oscar Wilde

"Do you really believe your husband when he tells you he goes fishing every weekend?" asked Jane's best friend. "Why shouldn't I?" said Jane. "Well, maybe he is having an affair?" "No way" said Jane "he never returns with any fish..."
This is the joke from a category: Fishing jokes

"I didn't see you in church last Sunday, Nigel. I hear you were out playing football instead." "That's not true, vicar. And I've got the fish to prove it!"
This is the joke from a category: Fishing jokes

Q. Where do fish sleep? A. In a river bed
This is the joke from a category: Fishing jokes

One man's hobby was fishing, he spent all his weekends near the river or lake, paying no attention to weather. One Sunday, early in the morning, he went to the river, as usual. It was cold and raining, and he decided to return back to his house. He came in, went to his bedroom, undressed and laid near his wife. "What a terrible weather today, honey." he said to her. "Yes. And my idiot went fishing!"
This is the joke from a category: Fishing jokes

While sports fishing off the Florida coast, a tourist capsized his boat. He could swim, but his fear of alligators kept him clinging to the overturned craft. Spotting and old beachcomber standing on the shore, the tourist shouted,"Are there any gators around here?!" "Naw," the man hollered back, "they ain't been around for years!" "Feeling safe, the tourist started swimming leisurely toward the shore. About halfway there he asked the guy,"How'd you get rid of the gators?" "We didn't do nothin'," the beachcomber said. "The sharks got 'em."
This is the joke from a category: Fishing jokes