Never leave that till tomorrow which you can do today.
Author: Benjamin Franklin

Space isn't remote at all. It's only an hour's drive away if your car could go straight upwards.
Author: Fred Hoyle

Speak the truth, but leave immediately after.
Author: Slovenian Proverb

Sport is imposing order on what was chaos.
Author: Anthony Starr

Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.
Author: W. C. Fields

The Spanish explorers went round the world in a galleon. How many galleons did the get to the mile !
This is the joke from a category: History jokes

Why did the pioneers cross the country in covered wagons ? Because they didn't want to wait 40 years for a train !
This is the joke from a category: History jokes

When crossing the Delaware River why did George Washington stand up in the boat ? He was afraid that if he sat down that someone would give him an oar to row !
This is the joke from a category: History jokes

Q: Where does Napolean keep his armies? A: In his sleevies!
This is the joke from a category: History jokes

Three buddies die in a car crash, and they go to heaven to an orientation. They are all asked, "When you are in your casket and friends and family are mourning upon you, what would you like to hear them say about you? The first guy says, "I would like to hear them say that I was a great doctor of my time, and a great family man." The second guy says, "I would like to hear that I was a wonderful husband and school teacher which made a huge difference in our children of tomorrow." The last guy replies, "I would like to hear them say, "Look! He's moving!"
This is the joke from a category: Heaven and hell jokes