Best quotes to send by SMS
O. Henry It was beautiful and simple, as truly great swindles are.
Author: O. Henry

William Penn If men will not be governed by God, they will be ruled by tyrants.
Author: William Penn

Joseph Addison It is folly for an eminent person to think of escaping censure, and a weakness to be affected by it. All the illustrious persons of antiquity, and indeed of every age, have passed through this fiery persecution. There is no defense against reproach but ob
Author: Joseph Addison

Lewis Carroll It's a poor sort of memory that only works backward.
Author: Lewis Carroll

Roberto Benigni It's a sign of mediocrity when you demonstrate gratitude with moderation.
Author: Roberto Benigni

The best jokes to send by SMS
Dance jokes Q. What do you call a one legged linedancer? A. Eileen (I Lean)
This is the joke from a category: Dance jokes

Dead and dying jokes A woman goes into a funeral home to make arrangements for her husband's funeral. She tells the director that she wants her husband to be buried in a dark blue suit. He asks, "Wouldn't it just be easier to bury him in the black suit that he's wearing?" But she insists that it must be a blue suit and gives him a blank check to buy one. When she comes back for the wake, she sees her husband in the coffin and he is wearing a beautiful blue suit. She tells the director how much she loves the suit and asks how much it cost. He says, "Actually, it didn't cost anything. The funniest thing happened. As soon as you left, another corpse was brought in, this one wearing a blue suit. I noticed that they were about the same size, and asked the other widow if she would mind if her husband were buried in a black suit. She said that was fine with her. So... I switched the heads."
This is the joke from a category: Dead and dying jokes

Dentist jokes Dentist: I have to pull the aching tooth, but don't worry it will take just five minutes. Patient: And how much will it cost? Dentist: It's $90.00. Patient: $90.00 for just a few minutes work??? Dentist: I can extract it very slowly if you like.
This is the joke from a category: Dentist jokes

Dinosaur jokes Q: How did the dinosaur feel after he ate a pillow? A: Down in the mouth!
This is the joke from a category: Dinosaur jokes

Dirty jokes The officer shouted orders to a nearby soldier. With considerable bravery, the GI ran directly onto the field of battle, in the line of fire, to retrieve a dispatch case from a dead soldier. In a hail of bullets, he dove back to safety. "Private," the officer said, "I'm recommending you for a medal. You risked your life to save the locations of our secret warehouses." "Warehouses?" the private shouted. "I thought you said whorehouses!"
This is the joke from a category: Dirty jokes