Best Cell Phones

In soft regions are born soft men.
Author: Herodotus

I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
Author: Rita Rudner

In the bleak midwinter Frosty wind made moan, Earth stood hard as iron, Water like a stone; Snow had fallen, snow on snow, Snow on snow, In the bleak midwinter, Long ago.
Author: Christina Rossetti

In the end, everything is a gag.
Author: Charlie Chaplin

In the fight between you and the world, back the world.
Author: Frank Zappa

What does a witch get if she's a poor traveler? Broom sick.
This is the joke from a category: Travel and tourist jokes

There was a little old lady from a small town in America who had to go to Texas. She was amazed at the size of her hotel and her suite. She went into the huge cafe and said to the waitress, who took her order for a cup of coffee, that she had never before seen anything as big as the hotel or her suite. "Everything's big in Texas ma'am," said the waitress. The coffee came in the biggest cup the old lady had ever seen. "I told you, ma'am, that everything is big in Texas," said the waitress. On her way back to her suite, the old lady got lost in the vast corridors. She opened the door of a darkened room and fell into an enormous swimming pool. "Please!" she screamed. "Don't flush it!"
This is the joke from a category: Travel and tourist jokes

The transatlantic liner was experiencing particularly heavy weather, and Mrs Jones wasn't feeling well. "Would you care for some more supper, ma'am?" asked the steward. "No, thanks," replied the wretched passenger. "Just throw it overboard to save me the trouble."
This is the joke from a category: Travel and tourist jokes

Police Officer: Why did you lead me on a five-state chase? Driver: I love to travel.
This is the joke from a category: Travel and tourist jokes

A client called in inquiring about a package to Hawaii. After going over all the cost info, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to California and then take the train to Hawaii?"
This is the joke from a category: Travel and tourist jokes