Best quotes to send by SMS
David Starr Jordan The world stands aside to let anyone pass who knows where he is going.
Author: David Starr Jordan

Jacques Bossuet The worst derangement of the spirit is to believe things because we want them to be so, not because we have seen them for what they are.
Author: Jacques Bossuet

George Bernard Shaw The worst sin toward our fellow creatures is not to hate them, but to be indifferent to them: that's the essence of inhumanity.
Author: George Bernard Shaw

Edith Sitwell I am an unpopular electric eel in a pool of catfish.
Author: Edith Sitwell

Angelina Jolie Therapy? I don't need that. The roles that I choose are my therapy.
Author: Angelina Jolie

The best jokes to send by SMS
Police jokes A rookie police officer was out for his first ride in a cruiser with an experienced partner. A call came in telling them to disperse some people who were loitering. The officers drove to the street and observed a small crowd standing on a corner. The rookie rolled down his window and said, "Let's get off the corner people." A few glances, but no one moved, so he barked again, "Let's get off that corner... NOW!" Intimidated, the group of people began to leave, casting puzzled stares in his direction. Proud of his first official act, the young policeman turned to his partner and asked, "Well, how did I do?" Pretty good," chuckled the vet, "especially since this is a bus stop."
This is the joke from a category: Police jokes

Police jokes Traffic was backed up for miles, the police were going car to car. When they got to my car I asked the officer what was going on. He said "It's Al Gore. He's up there threatening to set himself on fire! We are going car to car collecting donations." "Donations!" I said, "How much you got so far?" He said "about ten gallons."
This is the joke from a category: Police jokes

Police jokes A man was caught for speeding and went before the judge. The judge said, "What will you take....30 days or $30." The man replied, "I think I'll take the money."
This is the joke from a category: Police jokes

Police jokes A cop stops a man for running a stop sign and the subject gives the cop a lot of grief explaining that he did stop. After several minutes, the cop explained to the gentleman that he didn't stop, he just slowed down a little. The gentleman said 'Stop or slow down, what's the difference?'. The cop pulled the guy out of the car and hit him with a nightstick for about a minute and then said, 'Would you like for me to stop or just slow down?'
This is the joke from a category: Police jokes

Police jokes This guy walked into a little corner store with a shot gun and demanded all the cash from the cash drawer. After the cashier put the cash in a bag, the robber saw a bottle of scotch that he wanted behind the counter on the shelf. He told the cashier to put it in the bag as well, but the cashier refused and said "Because I don't believe you are over 21." The robber said he was, but the clerk still refused to give the scotch to him because he didn't believe him. At this point the robber took his drivers license out of his wallet and gave it to the clerk. The clerk looked it over, and agreed that the man was in fact over 21 and he put the scotch in the bag. The robber then ran from the store with his loot. The cashier promptly called the police and gave the name and address of the robber that he got off of the license. They arrested the robber two hours later.
This is the joke from a category: Police jokes