Best Cell Phones

In peace there's nothing so becomes a man As modest stillness and humility; But when the blast of war blows in our ears, Then imitate the action of the tiger: Stiffen the sinews, summon up the blood.
Author: William Shakespeare

In politics, absurdity is not a handicap.
Author: Napoleon Bonaparte

In soft regions are born soft men.
Author: Herodotus

I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
Author: Rita Rudner

In the bleak midwinter Frosty wind made moan, Earth stood hard as iron, Water like a stone; Snow had fallen, snow on snow, Snow on snow, In the bleak midwinter, Long ago.
Author: Christina Rossetti

Yo mama so fat she uses the interstate as a slip and slide.
This is the joke from a category: Yo momma jokes

UR MOMA IS SO HAIRY THAT HARRY POTTER GOT JEALOUS.
This is the joke from a category: Yo momma jokes

Yo mama so fat the last time she saw 90210 was on the scale!
This is the joke from a category: Yo momma jokes

You mama's so skinny ....she can hang glide with a dorito!
This is the joke from a category: Yo momma jokes

Yo mama so fat she has more chins than a chinese phone book
This is the joke from a category: Yo momma jokes