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I paint my own reality. The only thing I know is that I paint because I need to, and I paint whatever passes through my head without any other consideration.
Author: Frida Kahlo

I quit therapy because my analyst was trying to help me behind my back.
Author: Richard Lewis

I said to myself, I have things in my head that are not like what anyone has taught me - shapes and ideas so near to me - so natural to my way of being and thinking that it hasn't occurred to me to put them down. I decided to start anew, to strip away wha
Author: Georgia O'Keeffe

I sometimes think that the saving grace of America lies in the fact that the overwhelming majority of Americans are possessed of two great qualities- a sense of humor and a sense of proportion.
Author: Franklin D. Roosevelt

I think people that have a brother or sister don't realize how lucky they are. Sure, they fight a lot, but to know that there's always somebody there, somebody that's family.
Author: Trey Parker and Matt Stone

And Jesus said unto his disciples, "Whom do men say that I am?" And His disciples answered unto Him, "Master, thou art the supreme eschatological manifestation of omnipotent ecclesiastical authority, the absolute, divine, sacerdotal monarch." And Jesus said, "What?"
This is the joke from a category: Religious jokes

One day God called the Pope, and he said "John Paul I have good news and bad news. First the good news. I am tired of all the squabbling between the religions. I have decided there will be only the one true religion". The Pope was overjoyed and told God how wise his decision was, then asked "What's the bad news?". God said the bad news is that I am calling from Salt Lake City.
This is the joke from a category: Religious jokes

A little boy was learning about God in his church, and he was talking to his mother about it. She, not wanting to place prejudice in the little boy's mind, sat him and said: "God is not a man or a woman, and God is not black or white." To which the child responded, "Well, then is God Michael Jackson?"
This is the joke from a category: Religious jokes

What language do the Vatican Police speak? Pig Latin!
This is the joke from a category: Religious jokes

Morris was passing a small courtyard and heard voices murmuring. He went in and saw an altar with a large zero in the middle and a banner that said 'N I L'. White-robed people were kneeling before the altar chanting hymns to The Great Nullity ,The Blessed Emptiness, and The Big Zero in the Sky. Morris turned to a white-robed observer beside him and wispered, .... ...... "Is Nothing Sacred?"
This is the joke from a category: Religious jokes