Best Cell Phones

A friend is, as it were, a second self.
Author: Cicero

A full cup must be carried steadily.
Author: English Proverb

A gift - be it a present, a kind word or a job done with care and love - explains itself!... and if receivin' it embarrasses you, it's because your 'thanks box' is warped.
Author: Alice Childress

A goal without a plan is just a wish.
Author: Antoine de Saint-Exupery

A good conscience is a continual Christmas.
Author: Benjamin Franklin

McNally was taking his first plane ride, flying over the Rocky Mountains. The stewardess handed him a piece of chewing gum. "It's to keep your ears from popping at high altitudes," she explains. When the plane landed McNally rushed up to her. "Miss," he said, "I'm meetin' me wife right away. How do I get the gum out of me ears?"
This is the joke from a category: Aviation jokes

A pilot and a co-pilot were descending for a landing at an airport they had never been to before. The pilot looked out the windshield, and suddenly exclaimed to the co-pilot: "Holy cow! Look how short the runway is! I've never seen one that short!" The co-pilot looked out the windshield. "Wow! you're right! That's incredible! Are you sure we can make it?" "Well we better, we're almost out of fuel." So the captain got on the intercom, and notified the passengers to put their heads between their knees, and prepare for an emergency landing. Then he set the flaps to full down, and slowed the plane to just over stall speed. The big jumbo jet came screaming in, on the ragged edge of control. The pilot's hands were sweating, the co-pilot was praying. They touched down, and came screeching to a halt just before the edge of the runway, the tires smoking. "HEW! That was CLOSE!" yelled the captain. "That runway was SHORT!" "Yeah!" said the co-pilot, "and WIDE too!"
This is the joke from a category: Aviation jokes

On a flight with EasyJet back in 1997 the pilot made what can only be describes as an extremely heavy landing at Luton. It was very early in the morning and a number of passenger around me looked quite alarmed as, apart from the noise, a number of overhead lockers dropped open and several items of carry-on luggage were launched down the aisle. After slowing up, the aircraft turned off the runway and turned towards the stand and over the PA came "Good morning ladies gentlemen, this is Captain Smith, welcome to Luton...and if any of you were asleep...I bet you're not now!"
This is the joke from a category: Aviation jokes

Stewardess" "Yes, Sir?" "I want to complain about this airline. Every time I fly, I get the same seat, I can't see the in-flight movie and there are no windows blinds so I can't sleep." "Captain, shut up and land the plane."
This is the joke from a category: Aviation jokes

Why did the banana go out with the prune? Because he couldn't find a date.
This is the joke from a category: Banana jokes