Best Cell Phones

A fashion is nothing but an induced epidemic.
Author: George Bernard Shaw

A fellow who is always declaring he's no fool usually has his suspicions.
Author: Wilson Mizner

A finished person is a boring person.
Author: Anna Quindlen

A fool's brain digests philosophy into folly, science into superstition, and art into pedantry. Hence University education.
Author: George Bernard Shaw

A friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.
Author: Anonymous

A pilot and a co-pilot were descending for a landing at an airport they had never been to before. The pilot looked out the windshield, and suddenly exclaimed to the co-pilot: "Holy cow! Look how short the runway is! I've never seen one that short!" The co-pilot looked out the windshield. "Wow! you're right! That's incredible! Are you sure we can make it?" "Well we better, we're almost out of fuel." So the captain got on the intercom, and notified the passengers to put their heads between their knees, and prepare for an emergency landing. Then he set the flaps to full down, and slowed the plane to just over stall speed. The big jumbo jet came screaming in, on the ragged edge of control. The pilot's hands were sweating, the co-pilot was praying. They touched down, and came screeching to a halt just before the edge of the runway, the tires smoking. "HEW! That was CLOSE!" yelled the captain. "That runway was SHORT!" "Yeah!" said the co-pilot, "and WIDE too!"
This is the joke from a category: Aviation jokes

A man walks up to the counter at the airport. "Can I help you?" asks the agent. "I want a round trip ticket," says the man. "Where to?" asks the agent. "Right back to here."
This is the joke from a category: Aviation jokes

LH741: Tower, give me a rough time check Tower: It's Thursday, Sir.
This is the joke from a category: Aviation jokes

Tower: What's your heigth and position? Pilot: Well, I'm 6 foot tall and I'm sitting front left.
This is the joke from a category: Aviation jokes

As migration approached, two elderly vultures doubted they could make the trip south, so they decided to go by airplane. When they checked their baggage, the attendant noticed that they were carrying two dead raccoons. "Do you wish to check the raccoons through as luggage?" she asked. "No, thanks," replied the vultures. "They're carrion."
This is the joke from a category: Aviation jokes