I am here for a purpose and that purpose is to grow into a mountain, not to shrink to a grain of sand. Henceforth will I apply ALL my efforts to become the highest mountain of all and I will strain my potential until it cries for mercy.
Author: Og Mandino

Readiness of speech is often inability to hold the tongue.
Author: Jean Baptiste Rousseau

Reading this book is like waiting for the first shoe to drop.
Author: Ralph Novak

Other things may change us, but we start and end with family.
Author: Anthony Brandt

Real strength is not just a condition of one's muscle, but a tenderness in one's spirit.
Author: McCallister Dodds

Q: How many Oregonians does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Six. One to screw in the lightbulb and five to fend off all those Californians trying to share the experience.
This is the joke from a category: Ethnic jokes

Q: How do you stop a Polish army on horseback? A: Turn off the carousel.
This is the joke from a category: Ethnic jokes

An Italian, a Scotsman, and a Chinese fellow are hired at a construction site. The foreman points to a huge pile of sand and says to the Italian guy, "You're in charge of sweeping." To the Scotsman, he says, "You're in charge of shoveling." And to the Chinese guy, "You're in charge of supplies." The foreman then shrugs his beefy shoulders and says, "Now, I have to leave for a little while. I expect you guys to make a good dent in that pile of sand by the time I get back." A few hours later when the foreman returns, he sees that the pile of sand is still untouched. Pointing to the pile of sand, the forman says to the Italian, "Why didn't you sweep any of it?" The Italian replies in a heavy accent, "I no gotta broom. You tella the Chinesea guy he inna charge of a supplies, but hea disappeara, and I coulda no finda him!" Then the foreman turns to the Scotsman and asks, " Didn't I tell you to shovel that sand?" The Scotsman replies in his heavy brogue, "Aye, ye did, laddie, but I couldna get meself a shovel. Ye left the Chinee in charge of supplies, but I couldna find him!" The foreman is really angry now and storms off toward the pile of sand, looking for the Chinese guy. Just then, the Chinese guy springs out from behind the pile of sand and yells, "SUPPLIES!"
This is the joke from a category: Ethnic jokes

An Arab diplomat visiting the U.S. for the first time was being wined and dined by the State Department. The Grand Emir was unused to the salt in American foods (french fries, cheeses, salami, anchovies etc.) and was constantly sending his manservant Abdul to fetch him a glass of water. Time and again, Abdul would scamper off and return with a glass of water, but then came the time when he returned empty-handed. Abdul, you son of an ugly camel, where is my water? demanded the Grand Emir. A thousand pardons, O Illustrious One, stammered the wretched Abdul, white man sit on well.
This is the joke from a category: Ethnic jokes

Q: You go to a cockfight. How do you know if a Polak is there? A: He's the one with a duck.
This is the joke from a category: Ethnic jokes