Quotation ... A writer expresses himself in words that have been used before because they give his meaning better than he can give it himself, or because they are beautiful or witty, or because he expects them to touch a cord of association in his reader,
Author: Henry W. Fowler

Rain usually makes me feel mellow. Curl up in the corner time, slow down, smell the furniture. Today it just makes me feel wet.
Author: Jeff Melvoin

Rationality is the recognition of the fact that nothing can alter the truth and nothing can take precedence over that act of perceiving it.
Author: Ayn Rand

Read, every day, something no one else is reading. Think, every day, something no one else is thinking. Do, every day, something no one else would be silly enough to do. It is bad for the mind to be always part of unanimity.
Author: Christopher Morley

Irrationally held truths may be more harmful than reasoned errors.
Author: Thomas H. Huxley

An Irishman joined the American Air Force and was making his first parachute jump. The instructor said, "When you jump out of the plane, shout Geronimo and pull the ripcord." When the Irishman woke up in hospital a few days later the first thing he said was, "What was the name of that Indian again?"
This is the joke from a category: Ethnic jokes

Q: How many Canadians does it take to change a lightbulb ? A: Twelve. Four to form a Parliamentary study committee to decide how to solve the problem, one Francophone to complain that I didn't translate this joke into French, one Native Canadian to protest that the interests of Native Canadians have been overlooked, one woman from the National Action Committee On the Status Of Women to say that women have been underrepresented in the process, one to go over the border to the Niagara Falls Factory Outlet Mall and buy a new bulb and not pay duty on it on the way back, one to actually screw it in, one to collect taxes on the whole procedure so the government can afford it, one to buy a case of Molson for everybody to drink, and one to drop the puck.
This is the joke from a category: Ethnic jokes

Q: How many Ethiopians does it take to change a lightbulb ? A: Three. One to change it and two to squabble over who gets to eat the packaging.
This is the joke from a category: Ethnic jokes

Q: How many retarded Italian gardeners does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: One, but don't expect results.
This is the joke from a category: Ethnic jokes

Q: How many Americans does it take to change a lightbulb ? A: Two. One to replace it and one to tell him it was burned out (in states that still have car-inspection laws.) A: Three. One to stand on the ladder, and two to carry enough light bulbs until one is found that isn't defective. A: 250,000,000, one to change it and 249,999,999 to debate whether it it was politically correct.
This is the joke from a category: Ethnic jokes