The impersonal hand of government can never replace the helping hand of a neighbor.
Author: Hubert H. Humphrey

The important thing is to know when to laugh, or since laughing is somewhat undignified to smile. But the smile must be of the right kind must have understanding in it, and friendliness, and a good deal of patience.
Author: Roderic Owen

I'm glad I didn't have to fight in any war. I'm glad I didn't have to pick up a gun. I'm glad I didn't get killed or kill somebody. I hope my kids enjoy the same lack of manhood.
Author: Tom Hanks

The Internet is like alcohol in some sense. It accentuates what you would do anyway. If you want to be a loner, you can be more alone. If you want to connect, it makes it easier to connect.
Author: Esther Dyson

The key to non-anxious sermon-writing is that its not about me. Its about the congregation. I honor the fact that the listeners bring more to the sermon than I do. I remind myself of the hundreds of times someone says, 'I loved how you said' and then tell
Author: Reverend Sean Parker Dennison

Knock Knock Who's there ! Cynthia ! Cynthia who ? Cynthia you been away I missed you !
This is the joke from a category: Knock Knock jokes

A lawyer named Strange died, and his friend asked the tombstone maker to inscribe on his tombstone, "Here lies Strange, an honest man, and a lawyer." The inscriber insisted that such an inscription would be confusing, for passersby would tend to think that three men were buried under the stone. However he suggested an alternative: He would inscribe, "Here lies a man who was both honest and a lawyer. That way, whenever anyone walked by the tombstone and read it, they would be certain to remark: "That's Strange!"
This is the joke from a category: Lawyer jokes

It seems that a devout, good couple was about to get married, but a tragic car accident ended their lives. When they got to heaven, they asked St. Peter if he could arrange for them to get married, saying that it was what they had hoped for in life, and they still desired wedded union. He thought about it and agreed, but said they would have to wait. It was almost one hundred years later when St. Peter sent for them. They were married in a simple ceremony. So things went on, for thirty years or so, but they determined, in this time, that eternity was best not spent together. They went back to St. Peter, and said: "We thought we would be happy forever, but now we believe that we have irreconcilable differences. Is there any way we can get divorced?" "Are you kidding?" said St. Peter. "It took me a hundred years to get a priest up here to marry you. I will never get a lawyer!"
This is the joke from a category: Lawyer jokes

A tough case was being argued in court. The defense attorney, feeling that he was in trouble, sent the judge a bottle of hundred-year old brandy. The defendant was fit to be tied. "The judge'll kill me. Trying to bribe him! We're dead!" "I don't think so," his attorney told him. "I sent it in the other lawyer's name!"
This is the joke from a category: Lawyer jokes

The first lawyer questioning a panel of prospective jurors began right off as an intimidating showman. When he came to his question, "Do any of you here today dislike lawyers?" they stiffened and hesitated. Before the pause became too long, the judge announced, "I do."
This is the joke from a category: Lawyer jokes