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Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
Author: Albert Einstein

Instant gratification takes too long.
Author: Carrie Fisher

I want to find a voracious, small-minded predator and name it after the IRS.
Author: Robert Bakker

Intimacy is what makes a marriage, not a ceremony, not a piece of paper from the state.
Author: Kathleen Norris

Is sloppiness in speech caused by ignorance or apathy? I don't know and I don't care.
Author: William Safire

What happened to the lizard in the wizard's garden pond? He had him newt-ered.
This is the joke from a category: Various animal jokes

Q. Why did Mrs. Smokey the Bear divorce Smokey the Bear? A. Because every time she got hot, he'd beat her with a shovel!
This is the joke from a category: Various animal jokes

Exasperated dragon on the field of battle: "Mother said there would be knights like this."
This is the joke from a category: Various animal jokes

One day there was a tortoise walking on the road. Along came the hare that had once been defeated by the tortoise in a race. The hare was so angry from what had happened to him so he challenged him to another race. The tortoise gladly accepted his challenge. It ended up that the tortoise and the hare never finished the race because they both took a nap right before the finish line. So the tortoise is still the champion of the race. So remember this you snooze you loose!
This is the joke from a category: Various animal jokes

A fish walks into a bar, the bartender asks, "What would you like?" the fish says holding his neck, "Water".
This is the joke from a category: Various animal jokes