Best quotes to send by SMS

It is forbidden to kill; therefore all murderers are punished unless they kill in large numbers and to the sound of trumpets.
Author: Voltaire
It is good to be without vices, but it is not good to be without temptations.
Author: Walter Bagehot
It is hard to have patience with people who say "There is no death" or "Death doesn't matter." There is death. And whatever is matters. And whatever happens has consequences, and it and they are irrevocable and irreversible. You might as well say that bir
Author: C. S. Lewis
It is impossible that anything so natural, so necessary, and so universal as death, should ever have been designed by Providence as an evil to mankind.
Author: Jonathan Swift
If there is another world, he lives in bliss. If there is none, he made the best of this.
Author: Robert Burns
The best jokes to send by SMS

Teacher: If 1+1=2 and 2+2=4, what is
4+4?
Pupil: That's not fair!
You answer the easy ones and leave us with
the hard one!
This is the joke from a category: School jokes
What do you do if you find a black mamba in your
toilet?
Wait until he's finished.
This is the joke from a category: Snake jokes
Where do Snowmen go to dance?
To
snowballs.
This is the joke from a category: Snowman jokes
A woman at a gas station noticed a spaceship
landing in
front of her. An alien stepped out of the spaceship and
started to pump
gas into it. The woman noticed the letters
''U.F.O.'' printed on
the side of the ship. She turned to the alien and
asked ''Does U.F.O.
stand for Unidentified Flying Object?''
The alien answered, ''No, it stands for Unleaded Fuel Only!''
This is the joke from a category: Space jokes
Where do football directors go when they are fed
up?
The bored room!
This is the joke from a category: Sport jokes