Best Cell Phones

Be master of your petty annoyances and conserve your energies for the big, worthwhile things. It isn't the mountain ahead that wears you out - it's the grain of sand in your shoe.
Author: Robert Service

Be neither too remote nor too familiar.
Author: Prince Charles

Be not ashamed of mistakes and thus make them crimes.
Author: Confucius

Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good.
Author: Bible

Be not too hasty either with praise or blame; speak always as though you were giving evidence before the judgement-seat of the Gods.
Author: Seneca

Question: What is the difference between a woman in church and a woman in a bathtub? Answer: One has hope in her soul, the other has soap in her hole.
This is the joke from a category: Dirty jokes

Q: Which sexual position produces the ugliest children? A: Ask your mother.
This is the joke from a category: Dirty jokes

Q: What's the difference between getting a divorce and getting circumcised? A: When you get a divorce, you get rid of the whole prick!
This is the joke from a category: Dirty jokes

Q: Which of the following doesn't belong: wife, meat, eggs, blow job? A: The blow job. You can beat your wife, your eggs, or your meat; but you just can't beat a blow job.
This is the joke from a category: Dirty jokes

Q: Did you hear the slogan for the the new "Stealth Condom?" A: "They'll never see you coming."
This is the joke from a category: Dirty jokes