Best Cell Phones

Home computers are being called upon to perform many new functions, including the consumption of homework formerly eaten by the dog.
Author: Doug Larson

Honesty is a good thing, but it is not profitable to its possessor unless it is kept under control.
Author: Don Marquis

Honesty is the only way with anyone, when you'll be so close as to be living inside each other's skins.
Author: Lois McMaster Bujold

Household tasks are easier and quicker when they are done by somebody else.
Author: James Thorpe

How beautiful it is to do nothing, and then rest afterward.
Author: Spanish Proverb

A woman decided to have her portrait painted. She told the artist, "Paint me with diamond earrings, a diamond necklace, emerald bracelets and a ruby pendant." "But you are not wearing any of those things." "I know," she said. "It's in case I should die before my husband. I'm sure he will remarry right away, and I want his new wife to go nuts looking for the jewelry."
This is the joke from a category: Marriage jokes

Two ladies were hanging out together and one was depressed. "What's wrong?" The depressed one replied, "I've been married four times and everyone of my husbands has passed away." The other lady asked, "What did they used to do?" The depressed lady replied, "Well, my first husband was a millionaire, the second was a magician, the third was an evangelist, and the fourth was a mortician." And the other said, "Oh, one for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, and four to go."
This is the joke from a category: Marriage jokes

Men are like bank accounts. Without a lot of money, they don't generate much interest.
This is the joke from a category: Men jokes

Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman? - Because a woman who can't afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
This is the joke from a category: Men jokes

Q. How does a man show he's planning for the future? A. He buys two cases of beer instead of one.
This is the joke from a category: Men jokes