Best Cell Phones

The universe may have a purpose, but nothing we know suggests that, if so, this purpose has any similarity to ours.
Author: Bertrand Russell

The use of force alone is but temporary. It may subdue for a moment; but it does not remove the necessity of subduing again: and a nation is not governed, which is perpetually to be conquered.
Author: Gelett Burgess

Just because you are blind, and unable to see my beauty doesn't mean it does not exist.
Author: Margaret Cho

The way to final freedom is within thy self.
Author: The Book of the Golden Precepts

The way you define yourself as a writer is that you write every time you have a free minute. If you didn't behave that way you would never do anything.
Author: John Irving

Q: What's the difference between God and fighter pilots? A: God doesn't think he's a fighter pilot.
This is the joke from a category: Military jokes

An Israeli soldier who just enlisted asked the Commanding Officer for a 3-day pass. The CO says "Are you crazy? You just join the Israeli army, and you already want a 3-day pass? You must do something spectacular for that recognition!" So the soldier comes back a day later in an Arab tank! The CO was so impressed, he asked "How did you do it?" "Well, I jumped in a tank, and went toward the border with the Arabs. I approached the border, and saw an Arab tank. I put my white flag up, the Arab tank put his white flag up. I said to the Arab soldier, "Do you want to get a three-day pass? So we exchanged tanks!"
This is the joke from a category: Military jokes

A sailor in the Navy who had been at sea for a long time was anxious to be reunited with his girlfriend, so he sent her the following message a few days before his ship was due back in port: "I have missed you so much and I can't wait to make love to you. I want you to come down to the pier to meet me, and I want you to bring the station wagon and have a mattress ready in the back so we can do "it" as soon as I step ashore." The young lady who was just as anxious to make love, sent him a reply: "I will get the station wagon ready as you said, but you had better be the first one off that ship, sailor, because I am not checking I.D. cards."
This is the joke from a category: Military jokes

Having passed the enlistment physical, Jon was asked by the doctor, "Why do you want to join the Navy, son?" "My father said it'd be a good idea, sir." "Oh? And what does your father do?" "He's in the Army, sir."
This is the joke from a category: Military jokes

- How many Iraqis does it take to launch a Scud missile? - Two. One to launch it, one to watch CNN to find out where it landed.
This is the joke from a category: Military jokes