Best Cell Phones

One should absorb the colour of life, but one should never remember its details. Details are always vulgar.
Author: Oscar Wilde

One single grateful thought raised to heaven is the most perfect prayer.
Author: G. E. Lessing

One word sums up probably the responsibility of any vice president, and that one word is 'to be prepared'.
Author: Dan Quayle

One's dignity may be assaulted, vandalized and cruelly mocked, but cannot be taken away unless it is surrendered.
Author: Michael J. Fox

Only as you do know yourself can your brain serve you as a sharp and efficient tool. Know your own failings, passions, and prejudices so you can separate them from what you see.
Author: Bernard M. Baruch

A blonde goes into a bar. The bartender asks her what she would like, and she replies, "Bring me a beer." The bartender then asks, "Anheuser-Busch?" To which she replies, "Fine thanks, and how's your cock?"
This is the joke from a category: Dirty jokes

"Hello?" the blonde responded answering the phone. Hearing no response, she repeated, "Hello?" "I'll bet you want me to come over and take you into the bedroom, undress you, lick you from head to toe, and then make mad passionate love to you until dawn." the male voice whispered. "Scheesch! You're good." she replied. "You mean you can tell all that from two hello's?"
This is the joke from a category: Dirty jokes

Question: What's the difference between sin and shame? Answer: It is a sin to put it in, but it's a shame to pull it out.
This is the joke from a category: Dirty jokes

Question: What is the difference between a woman in church and a woman in a bathtub? Answer: One has hope in her soul, the other has soap in her hole.
This is the joke from a category: Dirty jokes

Q: Which sexual position produces the ugliest children? A: Ask your mother.
This is the joke from a category: Dirty jokes