Best quotes to send by SMS
Laurence J. Peter An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why the things he predicted yesterday didn't happen today.
Author: Laurence J. Peter

Mark Twain An Englishman is a person who does things because they have been done before. An American is a person who does things because they haven't been done before.
Author: Mark Twain

John H. Patterson An executive is a person who always decides; sometimes he decides correctly, but he always decides.
Author: John H. Patterson

Thomas Jefferson An honest man can feel no pleasure in the exercise of power over his fellow citizens.
Author: Thomas Jefferson

Frank Lloyd Wright An idea is salvation by imagination.
Author: Frank Lloyd Wright

The best jokes to send by SMS
Business jokes Before going to Europe on business, a man drove his Rolls Royce to a downtown NY City bank and went in to ask for an immediate loan of $5,000. The loan officer was quite taken a back, and requested collateral. "Well, then, here are the keys to my Rolls-Royce", the man said. The loan officer promptly had the car driven into the bank's underground parking for safekeeping, and gave him $5,000. Two weeks later, the man walked through the bank's doors, and asked to settle up his loan and get his car back. The loan officer checked the records and told him, "That will be $5,000 in principal, and $15.40 in interest." The man wrote out a check, thanked the loan officer, and started to walk away. "Wait sir," the loan officer said, "while you were gone, I found out you are a millionaire. Why in the world would you need to borrow? The man smiled. "Where else could I securely park my Rolls-Royce in Manhattan for two weeks and pay only $15.40?"
This is the joke from a category: Business jokes

Business jokes The boss returned from lunch in a good mood and called the whole staff in to listen to a couple of jokes he had picked up. Everybody, but one girl laughed uproariously. "What's the matter?" grumbled the boss. "Haven't you got a sense of humor?" "I don't have to laugh," she replied. "I'm leaving Friday."
This is the joke from a category: Business jokes

Business jokes A young man asked an old rich man how he made his money. The old guy fingered his worsted wool vest and said, "Well, son, it was 1932. The depth of the Great Depression. I was down to my last nickel. "I invested that nickel in an apple. I spent the entire day polishing the apple and, at the end of the day, I sold the apple for ten cents. "The next morning, I invested those ten cents in two apples. I spent the entire day polishing them and sold them at 5:00 pm for 20 cents. I continued this system for a month, by the end of which I'd accumulated a fortune of $1.37." "And that's how you built an empire?" the boy asked. "Heavens, no!" the man replied. "Then my wife's father died and left us two million dollars."
This is the joke from a category: Business jokes

Business jokes A motorist, driving by a Texas ranch, hit and killed a calf that was crossing the road. The driver went to the owner of the calf and explained what had happened. He then asked what the animal was worth. "Oh, about $200 today," said the rancher. "But in six years it would have been worth $900. So $900 is what I'm out." The motorist sat down and wrote out a check and handed it to the farmer. "Here," he said, "is the check for $900. It's postdated six years from now."
This is the joke from a category: Business jokes

Business jokes "The fees for withdrawing money from your ATM machines are expected to double, even triple. You're gonna pay two to three as much to withdraw your money so basically the ATM machines have become full service. Instead of getting robbed at the ATM machine the ATM machine robs you. You eliminate the middle man." - Jay Leno
This is the joke from a category: Business jokes