Best quotes to send by SMS

I will prepare and some day my chance will come.
Author: Abraham Lincoln
If we say a little it is easy to add, but having said too much it is hard to withdraw and never can it be done so quickly as to hinder the harm of our success.
Author: Saint Francis de Sales
I have a problem about being nearly sixty: I keep waking up in the morning and thinking I'm thirty-one.
Author: Elizabeth Janeway
If you can get nothing better out of the world, get a good dinner out of it, at least.
Author: Herman Melville
If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance.
Author: George Bernard Shaw
The best jokes to send by SMS

Customer: You
said these pants were pure
wool, but the label says "all cotton."
Salesman: Oh, that's just to
keep the moths away.
This is the joke from a category: Salesmen jokes
What do you have to know to be a real estate
salesman?
Lots.
This is the joke from a category: Salesmen jokes
Why did the teacher put the
lights
on?
Because the class was so dim!
This is the joke from a category: School jokes
Where did all the cuts and blood come
from?
The school went on a trip!
This is the joke from a category: School jokes
Why aren't you doing very well in
history?
Because the teacher keeps asking about things that happened before I
was born!
This is the joke from a category: School jokes