Best Cell Phones

Appetite, with an opinion of attaining, is called hope; the same, without such opinion, despair.
Author: Thomas Hobbes

Archaeology is not only the hand maid of history, it is also the conservator of art.
Author: Edward Bulwer-Lytton

Aren't we forgeting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa.
Author: Matt Groening

Arithmetic is being able to count up to twenty without taking off your shoes.
Author: Mickey Mouse

Art enables us to find ourselves and lose ourselves at the same time.
Author: Thomas Merton

Will and Bill were quarrelling about whose father was the stronger. Will said,' Well, you know the Pacific Ocean ? My father's the one who dug the hole for it.' Bill wasn't impressed, ' Well, that's nothing. You know the Dead Sea ? My father's the one who killed it !
This is the joke from a category: Children jokes

Dick and Jane were arguing furiously over the breakfast table. ' Oh you're so stupid!' shouted Dick. 'Dick!' said their father, 'that's quite enough of that! Now say you're sorry.' 'OK,' said Dick. 'Jane, I'm sorry you're stupid.'
This is the joke from a category: Children jokes

'Mum,' yelled Johnny from the kitchen, 'you know that dish you were always worried that I would break ?' 'Yes dear, what about it ?' 'Well your worries are over.'
This is the joke from a category: Children jokes

A little girl was next in line. 'My name's Curtain,' she said. 'I hope your first name is not Agnate ?' 'No, it's velvet !'
This is the joke from a category: Children jokes

Mum: Jackie, go outside and play with your whistle. Your father can't read his paper. Jackie: Wow, I'm only eight and I can read it
This is the joke from a category: Children jokes