Best Cell Phones

I hope this has taught you kids a lesson: kids never learn.
Author: Matt Groening

I just never let anything bother me, man. I know myself really well. Nobody's opinion of me can shake my opinion of myself.
Author: Ruben Studdard

I knew someone had to take the first step and I made up my mind not to move.
Author: Rosa Parks

I know how men in exile feed on dreams of hope.
Author: Aeschylus

I know not what course others may take, but as for me, give me liberty, or give me death.
Author: Patrick Henry

Q: What has dual airbags and has lots of room? A: The White House.
This is the joke from a category: Political jokes

Juggler, driving to his next performance, was stopped by the police. "What are those knives doing in your car?" asked the officer. "I juggle them in my act." "Oh yeah?" says the cop. "Let's see you do it." So the juggler starts tossing and juggling the knives. A guy driving by sees this and says, "Wow, am I glad I quit drinking. Look at the test they're making you do now!"
This is the joke from a category: Police jokes

Late one Friday night the policeman spotted a man driving very erratically through the streets of Dublin. They pulled the man over and asked him if he had been drinking that evening. "Aye, so I have. 'Tis Friday, you know, so me and the lads stopped by the pub where I had six or seven pints. And then there was something called "Happy Hour" and they served these mar-gar-itos which are quite good. I had four or five o' those. Then I had to drive me friend Mike home and O' course I had to go in for a couple of Guinness - couldn't be rude, ye know. Then I stopped on the way home to get another bottle for later .." And the man fumbled around in his coat until he located his bottle of whiskey, which he held up for inspection. The officer sighed, and said, "Sir, I'm afraid I'll need you to step out of the car and take a breathalyzer test." Indignantly, the man said, "Why? Don't ye believe me? !"
This is the joke from a category: Police jokes

A tourist asks a man in uniform, "Are you a policeman?" "No, I am an undercover detective." "So why are you in uniform?" "Today is my day off."
This is the joke from a category: Police jokes

A client of a hospital where they made brain transplantations asked about the prices. The doctor said, "Well, this Ph.D. brain costs $10,000. This brain belonged to a NASA top scientist and costs $15,000. Here we have a policeman's brain as well. It costs $50,000." The client asked, "What? How's that possible?" The doctor replied, "You see, it's totally unused."
This is the joke from a category: Police jokes