Best quotes to send by SMS

I don't have a girlfriend. But I do know a woman who'd be mad at me for saying that.
Author: Mitch Hedberg
Self-esteem is the reputation we acquire with ourselves.
Author: Nathaniel Branden
Never knock on Death's door: ring the bell and run away! Death really hates that!
Author: Matt Frewer
Setting a good example for children takes all the fun out of middle age.
Author: William Feather
I can't imagine anything worse than being required to have fun.
Author: Scott Westerfeld
The best jokes to send by SMS

How many hairs are in a dog's tail?
None. They
are all on the outside.
This is the joke from a category: Dog jokes
What kind of modeling clay does a dog use?
Fi-Do!
This is the joke from a category: Dog jokes
What is the difference between Father
Christmas and a warm dog ?
Father Christmas wears a whole suit, a dog just
pants!
This is the joke from a category: Dog jokes
Why did the dog jump into the sea?
He wanted to
chase the catfish!
This is the joke from a category: Dog jokes
Q: What's got four legs and no ears?
A: Mike
Tyson's dog.
This is the joke from a category: Dog jokes