Best Cell Phones

Civilization is the process of reducing the infinite to the finite.
Author: Oliver Wendell Holmes

Classical quotation is the parole of literary men all over the world.
Author: Samuel Johnson

Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.
Author: Mark Twain

Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum (I think that I think, therefore I think that I am.)
Author: Ambrose Bierce

Come unto these yellow sands, And then take hands: Courtsied when you have, and kiss'd The wild waves whist.
Author: William Shakespeare

Q: Why are cowgirls bowlegged? A: Cowboys like to eat with their hats on.
This is the joke from a category: Dirty jokes

Q: Define Transvestite: A: A guy who likes to eat, drink and be Mary.
This is the joke from a category: Dirty jokes

Q: What did Bill Clinton say to Monica? A: I told you to lick my erection, not wreck my election.
This is the joke from a category: Dirty jokes

This guy goes to the zoo one day. While standing in front of the gorilla's cage, a gust of wind swept some dust into his eye. As he rubbed his eyelid, the gorilla went crazy, bent open the bars, and beat the guy senseless. When the guy came to his senses, he reported the incident to the zookeeper. Nodding, the zookeeper explained that pulling down your eyelid means "F**k you!" in gorilla language. The explanation didn't make the victim feel any better and he vowed revenge. The next day he purchased two large knives, two party hats, two party horns, and a large sausage. Putting the sausage in his pants, he hurried to the zoo and over to the gorilla's cage, where he tossed a hat, a knife, and a party horn. Knowing that gorillas were natural mimics, he put on a party hat. The gorilla looked at him, looked at the hat, and put it on. Next, he picked up his horn and blew on it. The gorilla picked up his horn and did the same. Then the man picked up his knife, whipped the sausage out of his pants, and sliced it in half. The gorilla looked at the knife, looked at his own crotch, looked at the man, and pulled down his eyelid.
This is the joke from a category: Dirty jokes

With the divorce rate so high in America, a new organization has been formed called "Marriage Anonymous." Whenever a guy feels like getting married, they send over a woman with crulers in her hair, cream on her face and wearing a torn housecoat to nag him out of it.
This is the joke from a category: Divorce jokes