Best Cell Phones

Gratitude is our most direct line to God and the angels. If we take the time, no matter how crazy and troubled we feel, we can find something to be thankful for.
Author: Terry Lynn Taylor

Gray skies are just clouds passing over.
Author: Duke Ellington

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people.
Author: Eleanor Roosevelt

Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine.
Author: Fran Lebowitz

Great wisdom is generous; petty wisdom is contentious. Great speech is impassioned, small speech cantankerous.
Author: Chuang-tzu

A shy guy goes into a bar and sees a beautiful woman sitting at the bar. After an hour of gathering up his courage, he finally goes over to her and asks tentatively. "Would you mind if I chatted with you for a while?" To which she responds by yelling, at the top of her lungs, "No, I won't sleep with you tonight!" Everyone in the bar is now staring at them. Naturally, the guy is hopelessly and completely embarrassed and he slinks back to his table. After a few minutes, the woman walks over to him and apologizes. She smiles at him and says, "I'm sorry if I embarrassed you. You see, I'm a journalist and I've got an assignment to study how people respond to embarrassing situations." To which he responds, at the top of his lungs, "What do you mean $200?"
This is the joke from a category: Journalist jokes

How many journalists does it take to change a light bulb? "We just report the facts, we don't change them." Three. One to report it as an inspired government program to bring light to the people, one to report it as a diabolical government plot to deprive the poor of darkness, and one to win a Pulitzer prize for reporting that Electric Company hired a light bulb assassin to break the bulb in the first place.
This is the joke from a category: Journalist jokes

Reporter: My editor sent me to do the burglary. Policeman: You're too late - it's already been done.
This is the joke from a category: Journalist jokes

What do you get if you cross a sports reporter with a vegetable ? A common tater !
This is the joke from a category: Journalist jokes

An honest weatherman says, "Today's forecast is bright and sunny with an 80% chance that I'm wrong."
This is the joke from a category: Journalist jokes